I’m still writing.  I almost can’t believe it.  It’s a struggle to sit down, find a prompt, and fill a page with words.  I usually hate the words, but appreciate the stolen moments with my MUSE.  And I’ve learned something.

Nobody sees the world the same way as me.

Not really a huge [...]]]>

[Day 25 of 365]:

I’m still writing.  I almost can’t believe it.  It’s a struggle to sit down, find a prompt, and fill a page with words.  I usually hate the words, but appreciate the stolen moments with my MUSE.  And I’ve learned something.

Nobody sees the world the same way as me.

Not really a huge epiphany at first blush.  But what it means (at least to me) is that there is a point to all this scribbling and typing.  There’s a point to suffering through broken thoughts and story ideas that I can barely get on paper.  Every day I get better at describing the way I see the world.  Every day I get better at understanding how my world is different from yours and from my characters.  Everyday I get just a little bit better at putting those differences on paper.

Today’s writing was hard and worth every moment.  Not because it’s good (my inner critic despises every word) but because it proves that I still believe in my dreams.  I have a place to confront my demons and show them that I’m not impressed.  They still scare the crap out of me though.  Maybe tomorrow, I’ll scare them.

Writer’s Prompt: Write about something that frightens you.

Are you willing to wait?
Are you willing to withhold?
Can you contain your power?
Can you hold on to your dreams?

The world is patient, relaxed while we are tense.

Fuck!  Lara kept screaming.  Without a sound.

We could hear the wind for miles. Nothing but empty roads, street signs, and wind.  The sun was hot, burning a hole in the road.  You could almost feel the paint fading, moment by moment.  And yet, we still waited.

Why are we still here?

The hunger, the waiting, the prey would come one day soon.  Maybe this day.  The birds, black and tired screamed their own cries.  Lara felt kindred spirits drift by, the ghosts of predators past.  Nothing to see, nothing to taste, but the dry dusty wind and our own waiting.

Night, already.  Frozen, crouched, we watched the horizon for streams of light in the darkness.  And there they were.  How many days had we been there?  How many days had we been waiting?  How many days didn’t matter anymore.  The prey was here, the hunt was alive.  We were ready, ready to kill.  We welcomed them.

Screaming again, but not from us, not from the birds, not from the wind.  They were all screaming.  Holding on to the leather seats, to the broken windows, glass shards shredding their palms, watching the tires burn as we ripped them clear of the metal wreckage.  Screaming didn’t matter here. Not to them, not to us.  We didn’t care about the noise or the pain.

We only cared about the hunt.  The agony and ecstasy of playing with your food.  Would the right time ever come.  But our patience is rewarded.  Waiting forever made those last few moments the most precious, the most savored.  Their bodies filled with sweat, fear, anger, and all the sadness of life’s dreams left unfulfilled.

Why they ignored their hopes, we’ll never understand.  Why did they rush for a moment of dull and shiny greed instead of waiting, watching, searching for their real dreams.  Why did they forget what they truly wanted until those last moments, we can’t know.  Now they can never taste release from the waiting.

But we always do.

We dream of tasting.  We dream of the hunt and we are willing to wait.  We’d wait forever to taste our dreams, but we usually don’t have to wait that long.

The scent of them fills our mouth, we gulp their last breath as they exhale it.  Bittersweet and filled with death.  A piece of the world dies in our hands.  Our dreams are fulfilled as theirs die.  This is why we hunt, why we wait.  The kill is nothing.  The blood, the flesh, the bone, is nothing compared to the last breath of life.  So fleeting and yet it sustains us.

Lara and I wait for days, months, maybe years, living off their last breath.  A shining moment of life and death, the circle is complete because of us.  We give balance. We create balance.  Balance finally has meaning in that last breath.  It’s the breath of broken dreams. They realize they’ve been dead since they were born.  Only in that last moment of dying breath do they ever live.  Some even whisper their thanks, or beg for the gift of release that only we can give, Lara and I.  Their shining moment, a whole life lived just to die at our hands.

And then the breath is gone.  The body shudders but there’s nothing left.  The waiting is over, and so is the joy.  Life flutters away faster them it came and we return to the waiting.

The feast is over and we wonder, are you willing to wait?

“You block your dream when you allow your fear to grow bigger than your faith.”   ~Mary Manin Morrissey

Comments, links to your writing prompt results, and lurkers are always welcome.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear [...]]]>

Courage is a call to action — one that creative leaders never, ever ignore.  Leadership directs change.  Leadership drives growth.  And Leadership generates success by overcoming the fear of failure.  All because true Leaders build the courage to make decisions and accept the responsibility for their choices, alone.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear.  – Mark Twain

- ADMIT ONE -

Think about the last time you went to the movies.  Everybody goes to the movies to have a good time, to be entertained for a few hours, to experience the thrills, chills, loss, and love of an adventurous life.  But did you go with your friends and family or did you go by yourself? Most likely, you went with someone, because you wanted to share the excitement and responsibility together.

Very few people are willing to go to a movie alone.  Perhaps they are scared to be seen as unpopular.  Or perhaps they are afraid that their friends will be angry because they weren’t invited.  Maybe they are simply worried that they won’t be able to finish that huge bucket of popcorn all by themselves.  But a leader can use courage to over-ride all these small fears.  He can make a decision because a leader believes in his goals even if others do not, and still enjoy the process.

- PLEASE BE SEATED -

What if you decided to go alone, bought your ticket, and then discovered you were the only person in the entire movie theatre?  Consider the symmetry of coincidences that are required for this to happen.  And consider how your own choices have molded these coincidences into a special evening that the Universe reserved just for you.  (This does take place. It happened to me last week when I went to see the new Star Trek movie.)

Never be afraid to tread the path alone.  Know which is your path and follow it wherever it may lead you; do not feel you have to follow in someone else’s footsteps.  -Eileen Caddy

There’s a special feeling that occurs when the lights dim down and it’s just you and that huge movie screen.  The scary parts are scarier.  The funny parts are funnier.  You are free to yell at the screen and wave your hands without the fear of disturbing anyone else. (Which I highly recommend, by the way.)

For those two hours you are completely engrossed.  You had the courage to stay and watch the movie alone, to pick a goal and accept responsibility for your actions. Now, no one can distract you with a hushed whisper, a discrete cough, or a quickly silenced cell phone.  You can express deeper emotions and feel more distinct sensations without the concern that someone will judge you.   You are rewarded by the richness of an experience that many people never have. This reward is inherent to every courageous decision, whether it ends in success or not.

- DISPOSE OF ANY TRASH ON YOUR WAY OUT -

But, after the hero beats the bad guy, saves the city, and makes out with her soul mate as the sun drops below the horizon (a la Angelina Jolie in Tomb Raider), you realize you are still on your own.  Now, as you walk out of the theater, feeling refreshed and excited, you have a new choice.  You can feel anger, fear, or sadness that you had to go to such a great movie by yourself.  You can feel apathy and pretend you never decided to go in the first place.  Or, you can feel gratitude for the adventure, for making a choice and living through the repercussions of that choice.

As a leader, you must pick gratitude.  Because picking anger wastes the Power you just gained and picking apathy gives that Power away to someone else.  Neither of these will augment your level of courage.  By feeling gratitude, you accept your Power and strengthen your courage for the next important decision.

- ROLL THE CREDITS -

In essence the movie you just saw was about your life.  You have to be willing to experience your life on your own terms, through your own decisions and steer it toward the adventures you wish to take. Every time you face your fears with courage, by taking action and taking responsibility, you will acquire more leadership skills, more courage, and more Power.

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined.  As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler; solitude will not be solitude, poverty will not be poverty, nor weakness weakness. -Henry David Thoreau

You are the true Leader of your life, so you already have this innate courage.  Don’t ignore this Power and pass it on to others; like your boss, your spouse, or (eegads!) your television.  Don’t give away your Power to change, your Power to grow, your Power to overcome fear.  Instead develop your Power and develop your courage.  The more you believe in yourself, the more you will know that belief is justified. It’s as easy as going to the movies!

“You’re here because you know [...]]]>

Do you ever get the feeling that you’re wasting your life?  Running in circles, forever busy, but never getting anything of consequence done? You know that if you could just figure out what you SHOULD be doing with your life, you would finally feel the passion and motivation that’s been missing.

“You’re here because you know something. What you know you can’t explain, but you feel it. You’ve felt it your entire life, that there’s something wrong with the world. You don’t know what it is, but it’s there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad.” -Morpheus from The Matrix

What you’re looking for is your purpose.  And its not missing.  Its there, waiting in the shadows for you to discover it.

What Is the Matrix

The Princeton dictionary defines purpose as “an anticipated outcome that is intended or that guides your planned actions.”  But your life purpose isn’t just a goal.  It’s a goal that ignites endless passion, motivation, and emotion. And it doesn’t just guide your actions, it builds your life into the Hero’s Journey. The human story of overcoming difficulty where we discover that the internal rewards far outweigh the external ones.

Purpose can also be described as simply “what something is used for.”  And for many people, this is where the lack of clarity arises.  However, your purpose is NOT what someone or something uses you for, because no one but you can define your purpose.   Nor is your purpose the same things as your life’s Meaning.  The meaning of your life defines the context of your purpose, but not the actual goal.  For a better understanding of this, read Create a Meaningful Life.

The Red Pill

So what is your life purpose?  Just as is the case with so many Koans, or riddles of life, the answer is short and easy to understand.

Your life purpose is to share you inner self with others.

But not necessarily simple to act upon.

“Neo, sooner or later you’re going to realize just as I did that there’s a difference between knowing the path and walking the path. ” -Morpheus from The Matrix

For many people, this easy answer fills them with fear.  Fear that they don’t really know their true inner self. Fear of exposing themselves to others and being rejected.  Fear of failing or not being good enough.  Fear of succeeding but ending up alone at the top.  And each of these fears MUST be faced…. in time.

Although the short answer is hard to face, the good news is that the hard answer arises from a simple Q&A session.

Down The Rabbit Hole

Here’s how you find the hard answer.

1.  Ask yourself “Am I ready to know my purpose?” and listen to your internal Voice.  Remember, your internal Voice doesn’t sound like your parents, your boss, your coworkers, or anyone else.  Your Voice, whether it’s soft or loud, sounds like you and only you.  You’ll always know it, because it will always sound like the truth.  And, the answer to this first question will be YES.  That’s why you’re still reading.

Now that you’ve opened up to your Voice, you’re ready to…

2.  Ask yourself “Am I frightened of my purpose, even a little?” and accept whatever response you receive.  Many people will also answer this second question with YES.  This is a huge step.  You’ve accepted that you want to know your purpose and that you have fears associated with that purpose.

If you answered this second question with NO, then you may need to dig deeper or you may not be listening to your true Voice.  Perhaps your Daemon, your analytical side, is blocking your feelings with too much logic.  For example, the Daemon may respond “Of course I’m not afraid of my purpose.  I just haven’t figured out what it is. That’s why I haven’t done it yet.”  Don’t fight with the Daemon but don’t believe it’s BS either.  Fighting only gives it more power.  Instead, ask a more literal question such as “Am I afraid of acting on my purpose?”

Its important to recognize that you have fears linked to your life’s purpose. If you didn’t have any fears, you would already be doing exactly what you need to do.  This acceptance is critical when you…

3.  Ask yourself “What do I NEED to share with others that I haven’t shared yet?” and  “What do I NEED to do that I haven’t done yet?” Write every answer down in your journal.  Do you need to write your life story?  Do you need to quit your corporate job and become a teacher? Do you need to guide and inspire others? Everything.  Even if it’s “I don’t know” over and over again.  Write it down until you reach past your inhibitions and you begin to feel deep seated emotions. Write until you feel something, whether its anger, sadness, happiness, or fear.  Then, each time you feel emotions begin to well up, mark that entry, and continue writing.

Give this process at least 30 minutes to an hour.  Some bloggers say you can find your answer in 20 minutes, but I think it takes a little longer.  You need to give yourself some time to peel back the protective layers and let your Voice speak from the deepest part of your soul. Whether your list has 8 marked items or 80, these are the keys to your life’s purpose.

After you have marked as many entries as you want and you feel that nothing new is coming up then you…

4.  Sift through the marked answers to find the critical ones. Compare each marked answer and cross off or combine similar thoughts.  Prioritize your marked answers according to which ones have the most meaning, the most passion, the most emotional content for you.  These 5 to 10 answers are your Life Purpose.

The One

Taken together, the answers to your Life Purpose are absolutely unique to you.  They don’t signify the same ideas to anyone else and more importantly, they can’t be done by anyone else.  Their uniqueness defines you as the One to achieve them. It also defines you as the One who must face the associated fears.

“I’m going to let you in on a little secret. Being the One is like being love. No one can tell you you’re in love, you just know it. Through and through. Balls to bones.” -Oracle in The Matrix

Happily, the act of confronting your fears is also an act of creation.  Facing your fears creates a deeper understanding of your inner self. It indicates you have hope, faith, and belief that your inner self can overcome this obstacle and transform into something greater.  You already know you can be and do so much more.  Accept your belief, accept your Life Purpose, and turn to face one fear.

To begin, simply choose one piece of your Life Purpose and act.  Perhaps you need to take a Leap of Faith or perhaps you need more insight into the fear itself, but you must act.  To face your fears is to walk the Path of Purpose and live openly from you inner self. I know you can do this and so do you.

“I don’t know the future. I didn’t come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it’s going to begin.

I’m going to hang up this phone, and then I’m going to show these people what you don’t want them to see. I’m going to show them a world without you. A world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you. “ -Neo from The Matrix

BREAK

What is your Life Purpose? How are you working toward your Life Purpose? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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