Some days you can just feel the stickiness around you.  It holds you like a butterfly in honey… stuck in your rut, trapped in your box, the walls of a life, a job, or a career, that you don’t want, but can’t seem to get out of.  You can see a million ways to change, but how do you know which option is the right one.

So instead of taking action, you hesitate.  You hesitate because you’re not sure that whatever you do will actually change things enough to make a difference. So why put in all that hard work? How can you know if you are strong enough, smart enough, or fast enough to make a lasting change?

And the truth is, you’re probably not really “doing enough”….. But this isn’t actually a bad thing.  Before you curse me in 100 languages,  let me explain.

Right now, you know you’re not “enough.” And in many areas of your life you may never be “enough”.  Because the moment you are strong enough, smart enough, or fast enough you’ll probably stop trying to grow. You won’t need to transform or improve that area of your life anymore because you’ll already be “enough.”

Life, Without Change, is Death

You already know that your Spirit, Body, and Mind are complete (and if you didn’t know, now you do).  Although you are absolutely whole exactly as you are, you can never completely fill the available space to grow. You probably feel the need to BE MORE every single day and define this as “not enough.” But the need to be more is the urge to expand our knowledge, our ability to love, and our freedom to explore the unknown reaches of reality.

All you have to do is purge the fear of not being enough without removing the opportunity to grow. Then you’ll discover you CAN BE stronger, smarter, and faster in whatever passionate goals you define.  It’s the fear that is sticky.  It’s the fear that inhibits your transformation into a better career, a stronger relationship, and a more enjoyable life. Take this moment to let go of your fear.

Take Another Look

You may not always be strong enough, but that doesn’t mean you are not strong.  Your actions may not make enough of the changes you want, but that doesn’t mean that you cannot act or that you cannot change.  We are not meant to do everything today, but we are meant to grow everyday.  So the only true failure is to allow your fears to stop your transformation.

Nowadays most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are one’s mistakes. ~Oscar Wilde

Stop fighting “failure” and start examining your mistakes.  But be discerning, be choosy with your energy.  Don’t worry about every mistake, focus on those mistakes that connect directly with your true Life Purpose. Whenever you recognize that you have not done enough passionate, successful work, then you have discovered a new opportunity to grow. It is much easier to solve a problem when you know it’s root, otherwise it’ll just keep growing back.

Transform Into Good Enough

Step #1:  Stop asking “What Should I be doing about this?” and start paying attention to where your mistakes and your passions align.

Whenever a mistake upsets you, write it down.  Use your journal as a powerful tool to document where you fell short and why it upset you. How does this mistake effect your life purpose?  What have you learned by making this mistake?  What goal was effected?

Mistakes are the portals of discovery. ~James Joyce

By examining both your passions and your mistakes you are led toward the areas in your life that have the greatest, most rewarding transformations. Harness this knowledge.  Be aware of it!  And then let your internal Voice, your Heart, your Creative Muse, and your Logical Daemon work together to solve it.

Step #2: Now ask “What is inhibiting me from reaching my goal?” and “What can I do to overcome or sidestep this mistake?”

Make a list. By making a mistake, you’ve learned exactly where you didn’t have enough knowledge, enough strength, or applied enough passion. How can you respond to this mistake with actionable steps that will directly effect the outcome?  If you want a new job but blew your last interview, learn and PRACTICE your interview skills.  If you want to change your career but haven’t transitioned from your current job to a better one, CONTACT a mentor or a career change coach for some practical help.

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. ~George Bernard Shaw

Once you’ve defined a list, you’ll realize how much control you have over your life and your goals. The world will start to feel less like a box and more life a corridor of doors.  But, just creating a new ToDo list probably won’t be enough.  You have to break the sticky cycle of small actions, or you’ll end up doing nothing at all.

Step #3: Change the Rules of your Environment

Pick one area of your life and change it to provide encouragement around your passion filled goals in a way that addresses your mistakes directly.

Do you want to be a better leader but still can’t get a leadership role at you company? –> Consider how often you are reminding yourself of that goal… Have you posted your goal on your office wall? Do you read and learn about leadership skills every day? Do you reach out to leaders in your local community, online, or through a leadership organization and ask them for help?

You need to build a new reality that supports the improvements you are trying to make.  Remember, this is YOUR transformation.  You want to create your daily schedule, your surroundings, and your relationships so that it’s EASIER to reach your goals… EASIER to overcome your mistakes…. EASIER to align with your passions and your life purpose.

If you do each of these three steps, you will make significant strides in overcoming your mistakes, expanding your knowledge, reaching your goals, and achieving your Life purpose. But there is one more thing that can give you the most phenomenal Power boost to everything else you do.

Bonus Step: Believe

It’s so simply to write it.  So simple to say it.  But not so simple to do it.  You have to Believe. Believe that what you are doing will work, even when you make mistakes.  Believe that your goals are worthwhile, even when your peers say they are not.  Believe that living a life of passion is better than toiling away in apathy, even though everyone else seems to have already given up.  Just don’t give up. And you’ll already be closer to achievement than most of the people around you.

Your mistake does not define who you are…you are your possibilities. ~Oprah Winfrey

The life you want is waiting for you.  Your mistakes are just the guiding lights along the path.  “Not Good Enough” is a direct invitation from your New Reality to fly with Freedom.

Follow your Purpose, follow your Passion, Believe… and you will Achieve.

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What mistakes have been holding you back from your dreams? How have you used your mistakes to change your life? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.  ~William Shakespeare

You are afraid of something. I know you are.  I’m afraid of something too. It doesn’t matter what you fear, it matters what you do with it.  Every change in your life requires that you do something new, something you’ve never done before, something that scares you.  If you wish to grow, if you wish to live, you must act. Don’t wait to start living. Act with courage and discover the freedom to live NOW.

Life shrinks and expands in proportion to one’s courage.  ~Anais Nin

Pick three of your favorite courage builders from the list below and do them RIGHT NOW. Then pick the three courage builders that scared the crap out of you and set a deadline in your daily planner to complete each within one week.  If you don’t have a planner, post the three new actions on your bathroom mirror WITH the due date.  Then, go get yourself a daily planner, set some goals, and start achieving your dreams.

1. Ask for the leadership role on your next project.
2. Take an acting class and learn how to “act” like an idiot instead of doing it by accident.
3. Smile at complete strangers until one of them smiles back at you.
4. Compliment a complete stranger on anything (appearance, technical ability, possession, etc) you like about them. Ask them where they got it.
5. Get a black dragon Henna tattoo on your shoulder and show everyone.
6. Get a kick-ass resume and send it to 10 potential employers.
7. Call & speak to the hiring manger from10 potential employers.  Convince him to give you an interview.
8. Join your local chapter of Toastmasters and learn how to give a speech.
9. Volunteer at a local charity and learn how to give without asking for anything back.
10. Volunteer to present your current team project at the next customer review.
11. Start a blog about your most passionate goal.
12. Define your Life Purpose and send it to your 5 closest friends.  Ask them to help you get started.
13. Join a new community through Tribe.Net and make friends with someone you think is more interesting than you.
14. Research the internet for a new mentor.  Call and ask her to help you improve you skills & abilities.
15. Create a 6 month plan for your upcoming career change. Get career change guidance if you don’t know how.
16. Go out to a dance club and actually dance.
17. Take a social dancing class and learn that it takes both leaders and followers to make a project into something truly amazing.
18. Research a potential employer’s website and write a kick-ass cover letter to go with your kick-ass resume.
19. Buy a new business suit (at the mall, online retailer, or support your local Goodwill charity) that matches the promotion, leadership position, or raise that you want and deserve. Wear it the very next day at work.
20. Buy a set of red capes and wear them out to a park with your family and friends for a superhero picnic.
21. Frame your goals and hang them on the wall so that your family and friends will read them and ask you about your progress.
22. Teach a child how to read, do math, or sell lemonade on the corner (Marketing skills are just as important as a high school diploma).
23. Join a gym, hire a personal trainer, and commit to loosing 10 pounds in the next two months.
24. Ask 3 coworkers to write you a letter of recommendation for your upcoming performance review, raise discussion, or job hunt.
25. Build proof that you Rock! (You can even call it your Rockstar file) Collect written documents (letters, performance reviews, printed email) from your leadership & peers that you make a difference to your job, your community, and your friends. Ask for written proof whenever you finish a project.
26. Write a thank you letter to someone that helped you finish an important task last week. Hand deliver it and read it to them.
27. Cook dinner from scratch for 10 of your closest friends.  At dinner, make a toast to the most amazing thing you know about each one.
28. Introduce yourself to one of your neighbors even if you’ve lived on the same street for 15 years. Discover something you both have in common and talk about it.
29. Surprise your wife, husband, significant other, or best friend by personally delivering flowers at their work office. Don’t stay for more than 5 minutes and don’t tell anyone else.  Enjoy the reward of doing a good deed without asking for praise.
30. Write a short story or article, send it to a writing contest or magazine editor, and convince them to publish it.
31. Make a list of 30 things that scare you and show it to your best friend.
32. Tell someone NO and mean it.
33. Pick one of your risky but exciting goals, plan out the next 10 actions you need to complete in order to reach it and, do 2 of those actions within the next 24 hours.
34. Get a completely new haircut and don’t say anything to anyone about it, ever.
35. Create a Vision Board and hang it on your office or bedroom wall.  Spend 15 minutes a day envisioning the life you want to live and believing that your are capable of living that life. (Because you are!)
36. Read at least 1 quote about courage every day for the next 30 days. Here’s 10 of my favorites to get you started!

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.”  ~Ambrose Redmoon

“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”  ~Plato

“The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.”  ~Albert Einstein

“Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could only do a little.” ~Edmund Burke

“The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure.”  ~Sven Goran Eriksson

“Courage is the power to let go of the familiar.”  ~Raymond Lindquist

“If you wait to do everything until you’re sure it’s right, you’ll probably never do much of anything.” ~Win Borden

“Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Christopher Robin to Winnie-the-Pooh

“A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.”  ~William Shedd

The person who says something is impossible, should not interrupt the person who is doing it ~Chinese Proverb

Instead of giving it to fear, build the courage to face it one small step at a time. 10 steps from now, you’ll be surprised at what you have already accomplished. 20 steps from now you’ll be amazed at what you no longer fear. And in 36 steps, you might be ready to change your entire world.

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How do you inspire your own courage? What one action can you do everyday to start achieving your dreams and your goals? Share your ideas in the comment section!

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Change is Easy.  Making a choice is hard.  Before you start thinking I’ve banged my head at one too many Red Hot Chili Pepper concerts, consider how many times you actually made an important decision today.  How many times did you come up with an idea, make a choice about that idea, and then act on that idea without fear or hesitation?

If you made just one important decision today, you are doing better than most people.  And I hate to be the mean one to say it, but most people usually let others make decisions for them– like their boss, their coworkers, their friends, their family, or even their television or internet browser.  Did you CHOOSE to go to work on Monday, or did you HAVE to go to work?  Did you choose to increase your leadership abilities by taking an online class or did you HAVE to watch last weeks CSI episode?  Did you even choose the last movie you saw, or did you plunk down $11 to see the one EVERYONE else went to see?

Give it Away, Give it Away Now

Giving others the power to make decisions sometimes seems much easier than making the decision ourselves.  This ease is fueled by the false idea that if you don’t make the decision, then you aren’t responsible for the outcome.  So if anything “bad” happens, it’s not your fault.  Unfortunately, this belief is 100% wrong.  There’s not even a shred of truth here.

For example… what if you let your boss decide which project is most important in YOUR life? Whose goals will come to fruition faster, yours or his?  And what will your daily life consist of?  Your reality would be filled with indifferent actions toward meaningless tasks that  probably won’t help you reach ANY of YOUR goals.  So, you accepted the choice your boss made, and now you are living a passionless, boring existence helping someone else reach their goals by ignoring your own.  Who is responsible for this bad outcome?  And who is dealing with the difficult consequences?

When you blame others, you give up your power to change.  ~Author Unknown

Get smart, get down with the pow wow

Yes, that was harsh, but I want you to succeed.  I want you to choose your next career instead of falling into whatever turns up. And in order to get what you want out of life and make an inspiring career change, you need to trust your own decisions.  You need to consider what you want in your life, define your goals, plan out your actions, and then make something happen.  Your choices direct your reality. Even if you let someone else make the decisions, you are choosing to live in a world molded by their reality instead of your own.

A man sooner or later discovers that he is the master-gardener of his soul, the director of his life.  ~James Allen

To experience the amazing power inherent in making choices, only takes three steps:

1.  Make a Choice & take Action.

You can start with something small.  Decide to get fit and begin going to the gym every week.  Decide to get smarter and read for 1 hour every day.  Or simply choose to break a bad habit.

2.  Notice the Results.

As you accept your choice and continue acting in accordance with that choice, notice how your life begins to change.  How does your body feel after you go to the gym?  What have your learned about the world and yourself by reading daily?  Is it getting easier to break your bad habit?  I recommend you keep a journal to document these results, so you can create more awareness of how much a small action can change your life.

3.  Recognize that your Choice made the Results happen.

Every small choice you make and every action you take will effect your life.  You will experience the consequences, both good and bad.  Whatever the results are, they still indicate how much power you have over your own reality.  If you made the decision and you took the action, then you made the change happen. The more meaningful the decision, the more passionate the action, the larger the change you can create.

Reeling with the feeling, don’t stop, continue

Think about this for a minute.  If you are willing to make the important decisions in your life and accept full responsibility for every action you take, you have the power to change your reality almost instantly.

I can hear you yelling at your computer screen right now…. “But Change is hard! It doesn’t happen instantly!” I disagree.

Because all that time and effort is actually spent on making the decision, developing a reasonable plan for accomplishment and accepting the responsibility for the outcomes (known & unknown).  After you do all that, taking the essential actions to create change is relatively easy. Grass doesn’t strain to grow.  The sun doesn’t exert more effort to raise above the horizon than to fall below it.

Never been a better time than right now

If you’ve been trying to change something for a long time, start asking yourself what possible results you are afraid of facing? What will you be responsible for, if you reach your goal?

• Do you fear your own success? Afraid you’ll be overwhelmed and unable to spend time relaxing with your family and friends? Afraid you’ll do something amazing and then be unable to maintain that creative output forever?
• Do you fear failure? Afraid that if you attempt your goal and then fail, you’ll have nothing left to aspire toward?  Or that other people will judge you for your failure?
• Do you fear your relationships will be damaged? That your friends or family will disagree with your goals  and exclude you for your actions?
• Are you afraid to give up something that comforts you? Like your favorite foods, the mind-numbing effects of television, or even the addictive but relaxing effects of alcohol?

Almost every fear that you think of can be resolved by increasing your knowledge and developing a mitigation plan. Consider one of your important goals and write down all of your fears. Then write down one or two actions you can take to alleviate that specific fear.

For example, maybe you want to loose weight, but don’t want to be responsible for a decision that takes away all of your favorite foods.  Soothe that fear by creating a plan where you can eat your favorite foods, but only on Saturday and Sunday.  Perhaps you are inspired to change your career from engineering to project management, but you have no leadership experience and you’re afraid of being responsible for a team. Reduce that fear by learning the principals of leadership; read Seth Godins book about leadership, sign up for a leadership workshop, find a mentor, or consult with a career change coach.

Maybe you just want to produce an award winning break out song, but have had so many band member changes, you can barely remember who is who.  Take responsibility for your band’s success by spending day and night collaborating and recording “Give it Away” at a Mediterranean mansion instead of a boring recording studio.

Action springs not from thought, but from a readiness for responsibility.  ~Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Come on everybody, time to deliver

Before you can change, you must be able to take meaningful actions toward your goal.  Before you can take meaningful actions, you have to know how those actions will add up to the results that you want.  And before you can do that, you need to recognize the possible consequences and accept 100% responsibility for each one.

Once you stop worrying about how much time and effort it’ll take to change and start deciding what you really want (instead of what others tell you to want), you’ll discover you already have the power to change anything.  The moment you make a choice and accept full responsibility for that choice, you can harness that Power to direct your life toward accomplishing ANY goal.

Decide. Act. Change.

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What important decision is weighing on your mind? How do you plan to overcome your fears, accept the responsibility, and act? Share your ideas in the comment section!

If you enjoyed the article, please subscribe to LiraVaughan.com and share it with your friends using the Share & Enjoy social bookmarking sites. Thank you for your support!